We Have To Stop Protecting Abusers
Some of ya'll are dumpster juice, and I say that because you have hit too low to be considered trash. You know the juice that drips off fresh cut meat, sits in the bottom of the trash for a while and produces a terrible smell? That's what some of you are based on the reactions that were given when a domestic violence situation with a well known couple went public.
Two weeks ago, news got out that crooked tooth rapper Fabolous had turned himself into police over a domestic incident with his long time girlfriend and mother to his two children, Emily B. It was first reported that Fabulous was charged with domestic violence and making terroristic threats. It got even worse when when we learned that he had hit Emily B so hard that he caused two of her teeth to come out. Immediately, both men and women started to question whether or not Fabolous could be capable of something like this. No concern for Emily, huh? Yeah, that's nothing new. Now, all of this was in the police report and we haven't heard anything from Emily herself, but I don't believe any of this is far-fetched considering what happened next.
Several days later, TMZ released security footage that confirmed what some people don't want/choose not to believe about this famous rapper. In the video, we see Fabolous arguing with Emily's father, making threats, and charging towards her aggressively while children scream in the background, and this seems to coincide with the police report. Social media became a fire storm of men stating they needed to hear both sides before placing judgment and labeling Faoulous as an abuser. I'm not posting the video because I don't want to dignify it, but I didn't need to see a picture of Emily with a bruised or bloodied face to convince me that this was an abusive man. I should have expected the trash and horrible responses that came from not just men, but I didn't expect to hear it from women as well. Women were asking for picture proof that her teeth were knocked out. WTF IS WRONG WITH YA'LL??? Is there no concern for this women's safety? This takes me back to when Chris Brown was arrested for putting his hands on Rihanna and everyone wanted to blame her.
We have a problem. Why does the black community have such a hard time holding black celebrities accountable for their terrible behavior? Why is there always a "But wait"? Why aren't black women ever supported in these situations? It was so disheartening to see people say things like "Why didn't she just leave?" or "She probably did something to provoke him." Yeah, sure like someone is asking to get their teeth knocked out or want to walk around wearing a black eye. It's never that simple and people from the outside looking in don't understand that abuse didn't just start. This has probably been going for a while and it's now spilling over.
Domestic violence is not just physical abuse, but mental as well. Even when women do attempt to leave, they put themselves at greater risk of being harmed or even killed for that matter. Sometimes, it takes someone actually losing their life before others are convinced that their partner was violent. This isn't a stretch because right after a women loses her life, people are quick to say "Wow, he was really crazy." You don't say? Police protection is sometimes in vain because most abusers don't care about restraining orders or having a record. All they know is that this person is their property and they will do anything to keep him/her under their control.
Another manipulation trick is after a man strikes, they claim that they are ready to change their ways and that they are suffering from sort of past trauma. Being the caring people we are, women tend to want to fix these broken men and end up going back. Does it make them weak? No. It just shows that no matter how badly we are treated in a relationship, sometimes, we hold out hope that it can fixed and things will get better. Sadly, it doesn't 95% of the time.
We have to do better. We can't keep letting these celebrities flourish just because they are black, and we love their music. It sickens me that R. Kelly and Chris Brown are still able sell out concerts and make music when there's a new story out every week about their inappropriate and abusive behavior. There are hardcore Chris Brown fans who are saying that Fabolous needs to be crucified. But sis, you still support an abuser yourself. Who you do think was able to take down Bill Cosby? It sure wasn't the black community and that says a lot. Stars like The Game are both hopping on social media claiming that this isn't Fab's character and that social media is tearing this family apart. Sir, worry about the 7 million dollars you have to pay out for your own sexual harassment lawsuit.
Releasing that security footage might have been Emily's way of getting the truth out without having to speak because per usual, ya'll don't believe anything unless you have visual proof. The footage did nothing because Fabolous was right back on stage the next day performing next to Lil Kim (she's one nose job away from getting cut from my playlist) and thanking fans for their support. I guess this is just another episode of As the World Turns.....
Before you pop your gums to defend these people, think about your mother, aunt, sister, or cousin and think about someone physically abusing them. Does that change your mind now? In abusive relationship, we will never have a full story but no one deserves to be mistreated. Man or Woman.