When You're Single During Wedding Season
It’s that time of year again. No, I’m not talking about allergy season or an all white party. I’m talking about wedding season. Honestly, you should have seen this coming at least 6 months in advance. You’ve seen the proposals, received your save the date in the mail, and picked your dish. It’s an exciting time getting to witness someone you know get married, and while the entire event will be joyous, you’re reminded that it’s wedding season and you don’t have a plus one.
Please understand that I’m not writing this post to be a Debbie downer about being single. I’m simply acknowledging how wedding season can make a single woman feel. I know because as a single woman myself, it can be fun yet daunting. It feels good to show up to an event, such as a wedding, with a significant other on your arm. It makes you feel a part of the club, and there’s a small hope that you could be next. Unfortunately, relationships end, and you find yourself back at square one attending these events alone. People are asking what happened to such and such and when you are going to get married. It’s overwhelming and for a brief moment, you can hear your biological clock ticking in the background. I’m here to tell you sister that you aren’t alone in these feelings, and that this too shall pass.
As optimistic as I am, navigating wedding season last year as a newly single woman had me doubting myself for a moment. I noticed that people treated me slightly different since I was no longer a part of the “couple club.” Conversations seemed different, women were holding on to their men a little tighter when they noticed a single woman was in the midst, and looks of sympathy were frequent. There were moments when I just wanted to slam my hands on the table and yell “Cut it out.” Just because I’m single at this point in time doesn’t mean I’m down and out. Instead of sitting in my feelings, I peeped that the guy sitting next to me was single (and cute) and decided to chat it up. Besides, the day is all about the bride and groom and not about the fact that I didn’t have someone with me.
In order to survive wedding season solo dolo, I decided to change my mindset. Instead of sulking because I didn’t have a plus one, I would focus more on the celebration. Seeing two people you call friends pledge to love each other forever is a time to celebrate, and it deserves everyone’s full attention. In that moment, it doesn’t matter how I feel, and if I felt that strongly about being alone, I should have stayed home.
Ladies, your feelings are valid during this season, but you will survive. Don’t be the one sitting in the corner feeling sorry for yourself. Get up, find a single groomsmen to flirt with, enjoy the open bar (your real friends will have this at their wedding), and dance the night away. Your inner glow starts from within and people will notice. Your time is coming, and it might be when you least expect it.